Session 8

How to be more romantic

From Tighten The Knot: 14 Days to a Better Marriage

"Do you have a reservation?"

"Yes. Do you have a table ready for me and the girl of my dreams?"

Cue butterflies, batting eyelashes, and beaming smiles from my girlfriend. 

Romance makes moments like these possible, but real romance requires more than the fleeting feeling you get from holding hands while walking on the beach. Real romance is bigger than the butterflies after your first kiss. It ripens over time as you learn to pursue your spouse the way God pursues you. 

What can we learn about romance from the way Jesus pursues us? A lot. 

Love is an action.

First, we learn that love is an action. God loves us so much, He sent His one and only Son to pay the ultimate price for our true freedom (John 3:16). Jesus stepped out of heaven and took the form of a man to make a way for us to experience a perfect relationship with God. Jesus’ action stirs our affection for God and models extreme romantic pursuit. 

Second, we learn that love involves sacrifice. Jesus willingly offered Himself as a sacrifice for our sin (1 John 3:16). His example is what inspires us to lay aside our preferences, pride, and selfish desires to pursue another.

As we pursue God's heart and learn that He's been romancing us all along, we find Him waiting, arms opened wide, full of affection, comfort, and sheer delight. As we experience God's love in increasing measure, we can't help but share it with our spouse. 

Romantic interest sparks a desire to know more about a person. It's something God designed for so much more than helping your partner feel special. It's the hunger and thirst that tells our heart there's always more to know and experience about each other. 

Question for him:

• What romantic things have you stopped doing that you could start doing again?

Question for her:

• What’s the most romantic thing you and your spouse have ever done for each other?

Questions to talk about together:

• How is God pursuing you right now? How have you seen Him pursue you in the past?

• What’s one way I could show you love today?